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Transcript

Day 1: Self-Compassion is Neither Selfish Nor Self-Indulgent

Compassion in Action: Transform the World

Thank you to everyone who tuned into the first live video in this Compassion in Action miniseries that will take place over the course of 4 days! Each day, we’re focusing on a different sphere of compassion:

  • compassion for self

  • compassion for others

  • compassion for animals

  • compassion for the earth

Today was open to all subscribers. (Enjoy the video!) The rest of the week is for paid subscribers only—here’s what’s coming up to entice you to join!

Tuesday May 27th through Thursday the 29th

  • Day 2: Compassion for Others: When empathy is hard, and others challenge us

  • Day 3: Compassion for Animals: Being the best champions for the most vulnerable

  • Day 4: Compassion for the Earth: Small, meaningful steps for sustainable living

Today we kicked off our Compassion in Action live series by exploring the first—and often most neglected—sphere of compassion: compassion for ourselves.

Day 1: Self-Compassion Key Takeaways

We often think of compassion as something we extend outward, but it must begin within. When we exclude ourselves from the circle of care, we risk burnout, resentment, and even martyrdom. Self-compassion isn’t selfish, indulgent, or self-pitying. It’s the foundation of authentic, sustainable compassion for others.

To hear the full talk, reflections, and Q&A, watch the video replay, but here are some key takeaways.

  • Self-compassion is treating ourselves the way we treat those we care about most

  • We’re told to treat others the way we want to be treated—but do we treat ourselves the way we treat the most vulnerable?

  • You can’t make decisions that help others if those decisions harm you

  • Selfishness disregards others; self-compassion simply includes ourselves in the circle of care

  • We have to put our oxygen mask on first—only then can we help someone else

  • When we give from a place of depletion or with unspoken expectations, resentment builds. And resentment—whether directed inward or outward—isn’t compassion. It’s a signal we’re out of balance

  • Self-pity isolates us. It says poor me. Self-compassion connects us. It says this is hard—and I’m not alone

  • Self-indulgence seeks short-term comfort. Self-compassion seeks long-term well-being

  • Compassion that excludes the self isn’t sustainable

  • Just as compassion is cultivated, so is self-compassion. It’s a practice

  • Self-compassion is not the opposite of compassion for others—it’s what makes it possible.

We ended with a Loving-Kindness Meditation, an ancient practice that helps us cultivate compassion starting with ourselves. You’ll find a simplified version of it below.

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Loving-Kindness Meditation

Find a comfortable position, sitting or lying down. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths. Bring your awareness to your body and breath. Settle in.

Now, silently repeat the following phrases to yourself. You can place a hand on your heart if that feels comforting.

For yourself:

  • May I be well.

  • May I be happy.

  • May I be healthy.

  • May I live with ease.

For someone you love:
Bring a loved one to mind.

  • May you be well.

  • May you be happy.

  • May you be healthy.

  • May you live with ease.

For someone neutral:
Picture someone you don’t know well.

  • May you be well.

  • May you be happy.

  • May you be healthy.

  • May you live with ease.

For someone difficult:
Bring to mind someone you struggle with.

  • May you be well.

  • May you be happy.

  • May you be healthy.

  • May you live with ease.

For all beings:
Expand your awareness to include all living beings—human and nonhuman.

  • May all beings be well.

  • May all beings be happy.

  • May all beings be healthy.

  • May all beings live with ease.

Take a few more breaths. Rest in the warmth of this practice. And carry these intentions with you throughout your day.

If you found today’s session valuable, I invite you to become a paid subscriber to join me for the rest of the Compassion in Action series.

Your support helps sustain this work—and gives you access to the full series, our private chat, and other exclusive content. I’d love to have you with us.

If you’re already a paid subscriber, you will receive a notification the following days at 1:00 p.m. PT that our video is live. I also invite you to join our Private Chat!

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